as someone who’s actually been referred to as disruptive at my previous two jobs, you’d think writing a few words about what shapes my vision would be easy. i’ve successfully campaigned to unionize one of those workplaces and created a powerpoint (yes, a powerpoint) explaining to my cis white male boss why he could not pay me, the only woman (and woman of color) on my team, less than the men who were hired on after me for the exact same position at the other. writing them out though, i don’t think these things necessarily make me a disruptive person, perhaps just an employers walking nightmare.
it’s hard to find the balance between sharing things that are too personal and just personal enough. i’m not sure who will read this post but if you are, well, hi, thanks for being here. if you’re choosing to learn more about me and my history, it’s only fair that i show up authentically.
I
up until recently (pre-IOP) i checked off every characteristic of an adult who was the product of a turbulent and dysfunctional home. without getting too into it, my history as a once damaged and self-destructive person now makes me an advocate, intentional and soft (not to be mistaken with weak). it makes me good with people; i’m adaptable and receptive.
II
if you haven’t already noticed by my name or appearance, i’m also a woman of color. i’m afro puerto rican and japanese, aka waisan and blaisan, aka a nightmare. although my latinx roots aren’t as apparent in my work, my identity as an asian person is. this makes my vision unique by default, especially in a white cis male dominated field.
III
i’m an illustrator! although this makes shutting off my creative brain and odd desire to make everything have tears feel nearly impossible in design, it brings a lot of ideas and solutions to problems. it also means that working with more analytical and structured people requires me to learn and understand that creativity in itself is vast. that when we come together, we can create really cool shit that we wouldn’t have if we had to do it on our own.
IV
okay, this is an odd one but another thing that makes my vision unique is that i’m a high school dropout. despite how much i’ve struggled as a student before, i’m still choosing this path, i’m choosing this program. i’ve had an unconventional path but unconventional has began to feel like a gift lately.
it’s taken me 27 years (which is not that long, my life is really just starting) to realize that school is the best part of what will become my career. the learning is the most important part and the part that makes me feel most alive. i’m still finding my rhythm but nothing has felt more empowering than committing to being here. i think that’s what feels most unique to me, that i’m not coming into this with big plans of what my future will look like. just operating on blind faith that i’ll find my way to where i’m meant to be and what i’m meant to do as a creative.